Man in White!



 A write up doesn’t justify the institution that Tatayya was and I’m short of words to write about him to be honest. It’s not like we emotionally talk our hearts out, it was never that way. It’s hard to imagine him having a heart to heart discussion with someone really.

I can say our bond grew stronger only in the past 10 years, when we frequently discussed about Panchatantra, Bhagavadgita, Vishnu Sahasranamam, Time zones, his philosophy, Technology, helpers in the house (this was our personal fav) amongst other topics. Though these are his favourite topics of discussions with anyone, I was keen to understand what had led him to strongly believe in Panchatantra of all books & in general was intrigued by his way of thinking. To be honest, I wanted to ask my mom so many things, but things didn’t work out and those questions remained unanswered and there’s so much I don’t know about her like what was the happiest moment of her life. How did she feel when she lost her parents so young? So I decided to genuinely know the people I love and if I have a question I should immediately reach out and ask. I think this inquisitiveness got us closer.

I once asked him what his happiest moment in life was –


I thought he’d say when he completed his Ph.D. or may be when got the scholarship or something, but no it was ‘Panchatantra’ again :)

Some mornings I used to drive him and Nanamma to their walks, those were some of my favourite times, listening to ‘Bhaja Govindham’ on our way and then socializing with Nanamma’s walking buddies. But after Nanamma, I used to walk with Tatayya, he would proudly introduce me to his friends, someone would always give him company and I’d watch him from behind, sometimes taking secret pictures of him.


I called him every weekend after we moved, he always answered and made sure to talk to all 3 of us. He was the one who told me about ‘Christmas in Summer’, that the day is 23 Hours 56 Minutes long. In fact, just a few weeks back he asked me how long is the day and I said 23.56 Hrs, he was delighted! He loves to share knowledge, a rarity in this world now.

The world might say he’s an old man and this day was close, but to me, it’s like the pillars of my whole being are getting thinner. It’s like losing a part of our childhood, a part of us. Those 5 minutes of our call every week used to give me a sense of satisfaction, that far away from where I am, there’s love I can still seek.

But now as I navigate through this loss, I feel fortunate to have known this man in close proximity and call him family. I am thankful for the abundant knowledge he has shared with us through his books & conversations. I am grateful that my daughter will always remember her Pedda thata and the yummy milk he made specially for her. I am happy that he & Ashish shared a very special bond (which took me by surprise to be honest).

I remember him asking me to wait as he plucked some fresh lilies and gave them to me. He never said he loves us or that he was happy that we visited him, never expressed his emotions at all, but those lilies said it all. He may not be the conventional Tatayya, but to me, he was the BEST!  


Every morning I listen to Bhaja Govindham, I’ll think of you Tatayya!

Miss you more than you’ll ever know!








Comments

  1. Dr Neeraj RajJune 17, 2021 at 10:45 PM

    Very well written Amuktha! A man of few words but with deep understanding of life - I had the privilege of illustrating the cover for his first Panchatantra book and during that time, placement of each animal in context led to in depth explanations of each chapter and hidden meanings surfaced! He has gifted me each book that he has written and had me make PDF versions that he could electronically circulate, learning even at this age how to navigate through this digital world - we were connected on Messenger. A lovely title that actually captures the spirit!

    ReplyDelete
  2. itsamukthaJune 22, 2021 at 4:52 AM

    Thank you Neeraj uncle! He told me you helped him with the book :)

    ReplyDelete

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